Monday, March 23, 2009

The last straw that broke the camel's back....

Its kind of an irony that finally I fully understand what this proverb means. I first come across it in a public speaking competition back in 2006 when I was featured in The Star in the competition. It that point, I can’t understand what it fully meant. I just created a story about how I had a fight with a close friend about the first Malaysian Idol winner, Jacqueline Victor. I said that we disagreed and had a big fight that we broke off from being friends ever since that incident.
Well, today that story becomes a reality. If I were to tell my friends what happened, they would be stunned by my decision. It’s a known fact that I’m kinda of a talkative person who likes to comment. I do admit my mistake and bad behaviours. And it is at crossroad again that I decide that enough is enough. I do not mind being a joked and make fun off. But definitely there is a limit to that. I mean I have been trying to withstand this for the pass few years. Everyday I was being a clown that is so funny to be laugh and make fun off I guess that it becomes an amusement to others.
No matter how much I can take in being the laughing stalk of others, I’m a human being deep inside as well. I do have feelings and most of the times I just hid my feeling deep inside to avoid misunderstanding and arguments. I felt hurt each time being a laughing stalk as well. Try to be in my position and you will have a lot of Victoria Technology incidences.
Well, when enough is enough? It happens when I’m tired of so many works around me and felt stress out with all the workload and the pressure of performing to a certain expectation. Seriously, I just bottled up my feeling and I’m sick and tired of being harassed like a high school kid being bullied. I deserve a certain level of respect as a human at least and not being humiliated like a scum. Imagine your chair is constantly being kicked at while your try to concentrate in class when your whole body is tired and sick with all the work load and pressure from all sides to meet up to certain expectation. That is when the last straw broke the camel’s back. A camel certainly can carry all heavy loads on its back. But when it is sick and tired of the same work everyday, the lightest straw would break its back.
No matter what you call me, a loser or a defenseless bambi, or a jack ass. I decided to move on and the only way to do it is to cut off friendship with someone that like to bully me and humiliate me like a scum that doesn’t even deserve an existence. Thats it, no more comments. I’ll move on and I don’t mind not having someone that hurts me everyday to get loss from my life.

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